Are you still actively pursuing the goals you set for the new year? If you are like a lot of other people, the answer is no. Studies show that over 92% of News Years Resolutions fail. So many of us have great intentions when we set goals, but then give up when we start hitting road blocks, time constraints, or other various barriers.
I want to begin with an inspiring story from Tony Robbins. Before Sylvester Stallone made it big, he struggled for years trying to break into Hollywood. Producers told him he was too ugly and stupid and no one would want to watch him. He was on the brink of being homeless and completely broke, but he refused to give up.
Watching a fight one night –(this boxer getting the living daylights knocked out of him) he gets the idea for Rocky. According to Robbins- he wrote the script in one night. Stallone then takes the script to numerous producers; it turns out they want the script, but not him to be in it. They would tell him, “You’re a writer..not an actor”. Stallone would comment, “No-I’m an actor”. He wrote the script so he could play Rocky. He passes up an offer of $250,000 because he wasn’t’ going to be in the movie. Eventually, Stallone accepts an offer of $25,000 to star in his own movie. We have been entertained by the Rocky Series for years thanks to Stallone never giving up on his dream.
A strong determination and will is definitely necessary to accomplishing your goals. There is another factor as well that many experience, but don’t talk about. An interesting study conducted from the, “30 Days of Hustle” program reveals a reason that many people give up too soon on their goals.
They found that those who stop trying to be perfect and had fun along the way had a greater completion rate. Whether they were trying to lose weight, start a business, or get a raise, the less perfect they tried to be, the more productive they became.
The pressure from wanting to be perfect can cause a great deal of stress and anxiety. According to Jon Acuff, in his book Finish, that the first lie perfectionism tells you about goals is to quit if it isn’t perfect.
If we were to interview people about why they quit their goals, similar language would be used:
“I just got behind and I couldn’t get back on track”
“I am just too busy”
“This is taking too long and I should have reached my goal by now”
Know that if you keep going, that you will eventually reach your goal. It may not be in a way that you thought originally either. Going back to the Stallone example- he actually had to write a script with him as the main actor in order to be in a movie. I believe that if he was trying to be perfect in his pursuit of acting, he wouldn’t have found this road to breaking into Hollywood.
Perfectionism can also make you believe that you’re not good enough if you don’t’ reach your goal within a certain time frame.
If you are getting frustrated with a goal that you have not reached-there is nothing wrong with giving yourself more time. Go ahead and cut your goal in half or extend the time frame. Ask yourself – what is the worst that could happen? Why do you have to achieve this goal in a certain time frame?
I have a friend that confided in me that for a while she was beating herself up that she wasn’t making a full time living from her business yet. She thought that something must be wrong with her if she wasn’t able to accomplish this by now. Now, she has extended the time frame for this endeavor and is having fun and is way less stressed.
The path in how you get to your goals will never be perfect. A key factor to completing your goals is to develop a tolerance for imperfection. Don’t compare yourself to others or have unrealistic self-imposed ideas about how you are supposed to accomplish your goals. Just like Stallone, he could have given up the very first time he was rejected by a studio. Instead, he kept this dream in his heart and kept moving forward.
We would love to hear your thoughts on how perfectionism has impacted your goal setting. Please leave your questions or comments below!